MOWDY RANCH MUSTANGS
WAIVER, RELEASE, DISCLAIMER
IF YOU ARE LOOKING AT THIS WAIVER, YOU ARE CONSIDERING THE MUSTANG RUN – OUR BEST ADVICE – IF YOU’RE A WUSS – STAY HOME!!:
This trail has plenty of rocks, roots, stumps and other tripping hazards. There are stream crossings with stepping-stones. The trail is narrow at times and could be crowded as faster runners overtake slower ones. (Getting excited yet?)
A faster runner might, therefore, knock you to the side, causing you to slam headfirst into a tree or get impaled on a jagged root. There might be poison ivy, ticks, bugs, bees, snakes and other woodsy things you find in the great outdoors. (Isn’t this a great waiver?)
Wind and rain may create mud holes, fell trees and limbs and create hazards that race officials don’t even know about. If we know about a hazard, we will try to warn you, but there may be hazards we don’t know about and therefore can’t warn you. You’re on your own.
Vandals may swipe trail markings. You could veer off course and run straight into a horse’s ass for all we know. We suggest you yield to said horses if you see them. They have the right of way. In addition, race officials may deliberately create extra hazards. Just for fun. (Don’t worry, this gets better.) There will be water stops, but feel free to carry a water bottle and any food that you want. If you get dehydrated, it could be months before we find your pile of vulture-picked bones. (Ever had so much fun reading a disclaimer?)
But even though you might get hurt or lost, you’re agreeing to all this crap because you want to run this race. You are therefore releasing and discharging all race officials, volunteers, sponsors and municipalities, as well as the rocks, roots, bugs, tree limbs, and other stuff, dead or alive, gnarly or not, that might poke an eye out or otherwise hurt you because you know that trail running is a high-risk activity.
When you agree to run, you are certifying that you are physically fit, responsible for your own actions, and have sufficiently trained for an event of this nature. In other words, you won’t sue any of the people or groups responsible for this race if you get hurt. And if you are under 18, then your parent or guardian is signing this release. We are almost done but this is the important part. This trail has known hazards that we have warned you about, but there may also be unknown hazards of which we may not know and therefore can’t warn you about. Get it? So be careful, you are accepting all these risks; known and unknown. We wrote all this in plain English instead of Shakespearean legalese – so you have no excuses. Again, if you’re a wuss – just stay home.